Sexual Satisfaction and the Impact on Marriage
Staying together for the long-term creates comfort and loyalty. There is no surprise that spending time with your spouse can bring a lot of happiness, but for a lot of couples this also brings a stale sex life. Is frequent sex a needed routine? A new study by the Society for Personality and Social Psychology suggests that more sex may not always make you happier.
It’s no surprise that sexual satisfaction brings you a happy and fulfilled marriage, but how much is the right amount? Amy Muise, a social psychologist and postdoctoral fellow at the University of Toronto-Mississauga found that “although more frequent sex is associated with greater happiness, this link was no longer significant at a frequency of more than once a week.”
While other studies claim that more sex equals more happiness, Muise’s findings suggest that having better interaction among marital partners builds more intimate relationship among them, which doesn’t necessarily mean having sex everyday. In fact, according to the study, couples that have sex at least once a week are sexually satisfied in their marriage.
There is no magic formula that couples can follow to ensure a happy sex life. However, to achieve that goal, both partners need to feel good about how much sex they are having and how much control they have over their sex life. If one person takes control of when and how sex happens, resentment and anger can emerge, making the sexual satisfaction decline. In fact, a study by researchers at Munich’s Ludwig Maximilian University states that arguments and domestic disagreements were the root cause in the decline of sexual satisfaction in marriage.
Unfortunately, there are marriages that have become sexless and unsatisfied. The marriage may have died and the couple has decided to stay together for other reasons or they may have unintentionally formed into a platonic relationship. The sexual relationship between the two may be an indicator of deeper problems in the relationship such as lack of trust, intimacy, resentment or anger. These are all issues that can be worked on in therapy, if both people are willing to do the work.
If a relationship has become stale and sexless, there are other ways to be intimate with your partner that will increase the satisfaction. This can be anything from holding their hand to cuddling while watching a movie to simply kissing them every so often. Showing intimate affection plays a huge role in the desire of sexual satisfaction and how happy you and your spouse are in the marriage.
Sexual satisfaction in all forms is a vital part of a healthy marriage, but it’s not the whole picture. There are three components to having a satisfying marriage – emotional connection, mental connection, and sexual connection. If one of those is missing, everything else disappears. Take time to work on your whole relationship and build everything together to get all the satisfaction you need out of your marriage.